Winding Creek Circle

Really.

I wish I can put into words the loneliness I feel everytime the night creeps in and Im the only adult in the house. Even during the day, I dont have a decent companion to talk my common interests too, save for the laundrywoman who is actually a doll and my parents - but there is a limit in things you would like to talk about.

It has been more pronounced with our internet-less house (I applied for relocation connection by the way today).

What can I say. I really miss the husband everyday.
It doesnt get easier, even with me having the kids all by myself all day.

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I really have not gotten my groove back - after everything. It will take months before we are really settled in the house, and my mood swings are fast it scares me. One time Im so happy and assured and calm the next thing I knew Im getting nervous and depressed and close to panicking. I guess you can say Im a little bit depressed. I have not been able to fully digest my resignation when we needed to move to the suburbs, on top of that is the need for Edil to still work in the city. I have to give it to him, he has been working very hard and driving long hours for the house move to go smoothly. I wish we can get some extra moolah to be able to afford some massage therapy for the both of us soon.

Anyhow, this is the first night Edil is not sleeping at the house and iba pala sya. I pride myself for being independent and not needy when it comes to relationships but this one really almost did me in. I thought having Edil away during weeknights would be beneficial for me as Ill have more me time and be able to live independently - read: sarili kong diskarte. Iba din pala.

That is why marriages involve two persons, not one.
We are giving this situation a year to work itself out then we will explore other options.

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We are back in the city for now. We arrived earlier today hoping we can take the children to their pediatrician as planned - guess what? We slept in and woke up at 6PM. So naturally, I know we will be staying up late tonight. It is also the first time we got to be with the husband and I got to admit it really is easier when he is around - like I get to have my own timeout. I also have a sounding board when I get frustrated. Adjusting to him working in the city while we stay in the suburbs will be more hard work than I imagined it to be. (Especially now that we have a bigger house).

I promise as soon as we get settled and things are “easier” with regards to the money aspect, I’m taking the husband on a well-deserved break - just the two of us. We still havent found a helper for us in the house but Im sure I can request my mom to look out for the kids for a day. Since we live near Tagaytay already, I would be taking him to a picnic, complete with a picnic time picnic basket with everything else with grand flair!

I can get that here.

I also promise Ill make sure to to book the Boutique this year - which means I need to lose weight BIG time so I can enjoy the view at the tub

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